As Lillian watched the raging sea along the shoreline she felt the life she knew crumble around her. Her very existence seemed to be cracking itself apart as she watched the horizon line in vain and waited for the love that would never return to her.
As she drifted through the days that followed Douglass' death she found the small things that used to have little meaning became irreplaceable testaments to his existence.
Each time she felt the pain of his absence swelling against the confines of her chest, Lillian would ritualistically partake and embrace the things Douglass had loved in an attempt to keep him close to her.
Lillian began to subsist exclusively on canned sardines; Douglass' favorite food.
The intense salt over time became painful and dulling to her taste buds, but she persisted.
She took to constantly wearing a pair of Douglass' old work boots, thinking that there must be a part of him worn into the seams and laces. They were two sizes too large for her and soon rubbed her feet raw, but she couldn't stand the thought of taking them off.
Her saddest ritual of all
took place every night when
she would religiously call his cell
phone and listen to it ring and ring
and ring before going to his voicemail.
But these rituals never made her feel better.
Despite her efforts, with each day that passed she felt Douglass less and less.
She needed to speak with him, to hear his real voice. She needed to hold him in her arms again.
She needed his spirit to linger.
So she turned to other rituals.
Lillian's spells had failed to keep Douglass safe and in her arms, but she refused to let Death take him from her completely.
She devoted herself to communication rituals in order to find and speak with his spirit.
She gathered the materials she would need to make contact with Douglass: spell candles, ritual herbs and a communication device that would allow for him to speak to her. For this task she chose a pendulum. Lastly, she needed an object that had tied him to her when he was alive. She placed her wedding ring at the center of her pendulum chart.
White candles to protect against harm, repel evil energy and aid in attracting lost spirits.
The pendulum and pendulum chart allow spirits to communicate with those who seek them.
White sage prepares the mind for spiritual communication and begins the ritual.
As Lillian retreated into her spell work, she felt the ever growing presence of Death that seemed to surround her house.
She feared what Death had yet to take from her.